He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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