sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
