found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
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