I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
