smell my finger.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
