so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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