So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Randomize
