I woke up to her vacumming the grass
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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