the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
