ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
