So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
