I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
well, you know. whores of a feather.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
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