i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
MIDGETS
????
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
