Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
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