I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
I intend to get homeless drunk
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
