One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
When are your genitals available?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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