We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize
