pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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