fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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