gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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