Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize