White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
it was like his penis was on wheels.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Randomize
