her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Randomize