just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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