woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
