Farmville is her only friend.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Randomize
