the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
