North Korea, Best Korea!
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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