You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
