I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize
