dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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