3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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