Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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