If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
