Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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