bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
