Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
