i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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