I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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