Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
