North Korea, Best Korea!
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Sext me about skeletons
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
