my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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