hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
