Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
