Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
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