yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
