if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
