whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
