how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
