Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
soo... how was my night?
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
