i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
the gays at disneyland are vicious
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
