I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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